People Hate Lines, Reality

I had the *extreme* pleasure of going to the airport a couple weeks ago. I actually don't dislike airports or the seemingly pointless pages of steps one must go through in order to board a plane. The reason I don't mind is because I arrive unbelievably early when I travel, usually by 3 hours. Many people think I'm nuts for it, and I am in a way. I get really touchy about time and keeping a schedule. Perhaps that's because my years of getting lost have taught me to leave twice as much time for transit in order to actually show up anywhere on time, but regardless being early is a part of my personality that I really like. If I'm NOT in a hurry - I don't mind lines, I don't mind pushy people with absolutely no awareness of their own personal space or that of others, I don't even mind removing nearly every piece of clothing and disposing of anything that was once in or at one time may return to liquid form. The greatest thing about it, though, is to observe the human being in its literal state of "fight or flight".

There was an incredibly long line at the ticketing counter to check bags for domestic flights. It got into one of those windy-topsy-turvy-neither-here-nor-there-type situations where it was a little confusing as to where the end of the line was. There was (and I feel like this rarely happens), an incredibly cheerful, helpful young lady with red hair directing this herd of idiots. Since I was (as always) obscenely early, I could maintain my own chipper attitude while other people arrived late and panicked, huffed around, and made all kinds of strange faces. While well informed, I opted not to tell anyone what the deal was, not only because I was consistently ignored (fine with me; I'm early), but also because I was extraordinarily entertained by the fact that everyone who approached this line thought there there was some way that they could be exempt from standing in it. The rules set up by the cute redhead in the blue vest were clear, yet somehow, the time spent before deciding to stand in the line became a strategy session for approximately 6 familes within a 20 minute period. Each conversation went like this:

Family leader: "Where do we...?"

Cute redhead: "This is the line to stand in if you are checking bags for a domestic flight."

Family leader: "What if we...?"

Cute redhead: "Where are you flying?"

Family leader: "We...Miami...does that m-"

Cute redhead: "Do you have bags to check?"

Family leader: "Yes, but we..."

Cute redhead: "The end is just down that way."

Family leader: "Where is the line if we checked in online?"

Cute redhead: "This is the line."

Family leader: (sharing a sigh and a look with Family second in command, who is wrangling the children and their Hannah Montana suitcases) "No, we checked in onli-"

Cute redhead: "If you're checking bags, this is the line you stand in. This is the line everyone is standing in."

But people continued to believe that there was some other line, some HIDDEN line that they were going to have to give a password to find. Maybe slip the redhead a 20 and she'd send them through the plastic window of the baggage claim carousel where George Clooney would be waiting to take their bags and read to their kids while they sipped bloody marys in the Executive Lounge.

It was amazing how hard they were trying to avoid it. While I am certainly not innocent of complaining about waiting for something, I started to think, what's so bad about standing in a line? I mean, you're just standing there. And if you're not standing in this line, you're standing in the security line, and if you're not in that one you're wrestling elbows with everyone trying to get ONE person ahead as they board rows 15 and higher and once on the place you're still waiting for some jackass who's trying to sandwich a foot locker into the overhead bin - and he didn't check it why? Because he was trying to get out of standing in line! So what is the point of putting off the inevitable? If you have to stand in lines all fucking day, why not look at them as something more productive than an inconvenience?

And I think I should take this observation to all areas of my life. Patience has never been a huge virtue of mine, which is way I allot 5 hours to get anything done. But if I could just stop complaining and take a look around, stop feeling so entitled and put-upon, maybe next time the people around me wouldn't mind the wait either. And wouldn't that be nice?